I'm The Villain
by badwolf21
Summary: Set after Satan's Pit. Rose and the Doctor's relationship is put to the test after she comes back to the Tardis.
1. Chapter 1

_He is awake and you will worship him. _

She should have put the lamp on. It's a small lamp on her bedside table, but it does the job. Highlights the room and keeps the darkness at bay. But now the darkness had seeped closer into her mind. A couple of hours ago everything was fine. Rose came aboard the Tardis to be greeted by a smiling Doctor. They hugged like they always did, clinging to each other tight, not wanting to let go. But after the intercom was switched off, her relief faded and she realised what she'd done.

She killed a man.

_And that man who just left, that was Toby Zed, Archaeology… _

He was an innocent, possessed by the Beast. But he was like her, scared and alone. She wasn't even sure if he was still inside or if the Beast's influence had taken over completely. For all she knew he was gone the minute the Beast took control and clawed its way in. Stripping everything that made Toby… Toby.

_The Beast and his armies shall rise from the Pit to make war against God. _

Rose twisted and turned under her duvet. Every time she pulled off the covers the cold hit her and sent a shiver up her spine. So she heaved them back up and not long afterwards she felt like she was baking. The Doctor knew Rose would be exhausted after their journey, so he told her to go to bed and rest. Rose quickly agreed and went to her room. But when she got into bed; sleep was the last thing she wanted. It was as if her mind was screaming for rest but her body wouldn't comply. She thought of ringing her mother but then she might accidentally call her during the middle of night and receive an ear full. _Best not, _she decided.

Rose hauled herself out of bed and towards the kitchen. She peered through the door and thankfully it was empty. No Doctor in sight. The door creaked as she trudged in. She pulled out a glass and poured herself a glass of water.

Rose gulped down the water quickly but still felt dry. She turned back to the door and screamed. The glass dropped from her hand, shattering on impact, pieces flew under the units as water splashed across the floor.

Standing in the doorway was Toby in his demonic state. Eyes glowing red with the symbols of an ancient language tattooed on his pale skin. He tilted his head and stared at her.

"No, you can't be" Rose stuttered. She clamped her eyes shut, blocking out the image. When she opened them, he standing right in front of her.

"You're not here. This is dream. You're can't be here" Rose stepped away from him and backed into the kitchen counter with a bump. She knew that would leave a bruise, but at the moment the pain was nothing compared to the sight in front of her.

Toby glared at her.

And then he smiled.

That was the worst thing.

A slickly smile that was neither human nor devil.

"Doctor?" Rose said with a shaky voice.

"How does it feel?" Toby asked in a deep voice that shook her to her very core.

"What?" Rose whispered.

"To be a killer?"

"I didn't mean..."

"Do not lie, child. You knew exactly what you were doing when you pointed the gun and pulled the trigger".

Rose knew she had to be brave, be strong. But the crippling fear that the Beast, the devil, was in the Tardis made her heart beat frantically. She knew it fed off fear but she couldn't control herself. But this couldn't be real; Toby was pulled into the black hole. Wasn't he? How could this have happened? Images of the last twenty-four hours whirled in her head, trying to think of what could have gone wrong. But she knew that she needed something else. She needed her friend.

"Doctor!" Rose shouted at the top of her lungs.

But there was nothing. No spiky hair or brown coat whizzing through the door to save her. This wasn't right. Horrid thoughts filled her head of all the worst case scenarios. What if the Beast visited the Doctor first? What if he was dead?

"I'm sorry" she muttered.

Rose's eyes glanced back up to his face. Toby tensed up, raising his hands to his face, he screamed in agony. Rose looked around, unsure of what was happening. He lowered his hands and the black symbols and red eyes were gone. Toby looked around the kitchen, confused. Completely human.

"Rose, how could you?" he whimpered "We were on the same side." He looked so scared. Tears welled up in Rose's eyes. She opened her mouth to respond but no sound came out. Instead she placed a hand on his shoulder to try to comfort him. Solid. She could feel the cold fabric of his shirt.

"How is that—?"

She was cut off by Toby grabbing her throat, lifting her off the ground with ease. He'd changed back to his demonic appearance, eyes glowing brighter than ever. Struggling to breathe, Rose fought against his grip. She kicked him in the chest with all the strength she had but he didn't seem to feel a thing.

"What would your precious Doctor think of you? So weak. So tiny compared to the Beast".

Like a rag doll, Toby flung Rose back into the other side of the kitchen. She felt her head collide with the wall behind her, cracking it. Blood rushed to her ears and she heard Toby roar like a wild animal. He was enjoying taunting his prey. Rose winced in pain, but tried not to show it, she wouldn't dare give him the satisfaction.

Rose tried to heave herself up, but her hand slid and she collapsed back the floor. Surely she didn't hit her head that hard. But her fears were confirmed when she felt blood trickle down the back of her neck.

"You will lose and I will live".

Rose looked at her hand, coated in blood. Feeling weaker with every second, she knew she was going to pass out but had to know one thing beforehand. Something to keep her going.

"Is the Doctor alive?"

He met her gaze, but a laugh escaped his lips. A laugh that echoed through the room and out into the corridor.

"Do you think the Doctor will save you?"

"I believe in him." Her voice was barely a whisper.

She knew it was bad but if the Doctor was still aboard and breathing, then it wasn't that bad. He would save the day and come get her. Right? She stretched her arm to the door, as if she was reaching the Doctor's hand. But Rose's body was failing her and she lost consciousness.

**A/N: Really nervous about posting this, so please let me know what you think. Thanks xx**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thanks for the lovely comments so far - they made my day. xx**

"Rose! Rose!"

She shot up from the bed, gasping for breath. It took a second for her vision to clear but sitting on the bed next to her was a familiar Time Lord. His hair was all messy and on the end of his nose was his glasses. Usually Rose would be happy to see him looking like that, but the anxious look on his face made her think differently.

Rose felt a soft hand cup her cheek.

"Rose, what was it? Bad dream?"

She nodded and raised a hand to feel the back of her head. The Doctor saw what she was doing and instinctively to see what was wrong.

"Rose, tell me because you're beginning to panic me and that's not good". He said, meeting her gaze.

"I'm… fine" She mumbled.

She looked down on the floor, where her lamp was broken, smashed into tiny pieces. The Doctor followed her eye line. "Yeah, I rushed in when I heard something crash. Thought you might have fallen out of bed or something daft. Weeelll I was hoping it was something daft". He half-smiled at her, trying to release some of the tension.

Pulling off the covers, Rose stood up, still wary of her surroundings. The Doctor watched her carefully.

"I need a drink" she muttered.

"Okay," The Doctor backed to the door but never broke his eye contact. "Don't worry, I'll get it.

"No, it's okay".

She stepped out the room, shaky on her feet, but determined nonetheless. The Doctor followed her, keeping track of her movement. It wasn't often that he saw Rose this terrified and it unnerved him.

They came to the kitchen door and she stopped in her tracks. A few seconds passed, she took deep breath and gazed at the Doctor. He looked back at her, worried but there was warmth in his look. A look that Rose came to trust over the last couple of years, even though he had changed faces. That look was always the same.

She held out her hand and the Doctor instantly grabbed it. They opened the door together and walked inside. It was normal. No broken glass on the floor, no puddle of water, no crack in the wall. No cause for distress whatsoever.

Rose sighed, relieved, she grabbed a glass of water and gulped it straight down. She placed back on the counter, not to near the edge, scared similar events from her nightmare might occur. Rose hesitantly glanced at the Doctor and puffed out her cheeks.

He walked towards her and pulled her into a hug. They wrapped their arms around each other. Reassured, Rose could feel his hearts beating madly against her ear.

"Nightmare, it was just a nightmare" Rose stated pulling away slightly.

"It's more than that. Tell me"

They moved to the table and Rose told him everything, except the injury she thought she had. It was bad enough to have that image in her head, it didn't need to be in his as well.

It was strange to her to be so scared by a dream, when she had faced so many monsters before. The Doctor listened to her carefully, never looking away from her, taking it all in. More than anything she just wanted to forget it and put it behind her.

"Rose, it wasn't real," He said, taking off his glasses. "Sometimes our mind's play tricks on us. But you're safe here, in the Tardis, with me."

Rose nodded, but the images of red eyes and deep voice flooded her mind. She glanced behind him at the wall where she'd injured herself.

"What?" he asked, looking behind him.

"Nothing".

_He is awake… _

"I…" she started

_And you will worship him. _

Rose looked into the Doctor's eyes. "I killed a man".

"No, you didn't"

"I to... took that gun and shot it. I di… didn't even think twice" Her voice was shaking and she clamped her hand to her mouth. "What did I do?"

"Nothing" The Doctor stated "Absolutely nothing, Rose. You did what was best"

"He was human. It wasn't his fault. We could have helped him, we could have tried" She sobbed.

The Doctor moved from his chair, stepped towards Rose and placed his hands on her shoulders. "Rose, we can't save everyone. I'm sorry but that's just the way it is. If we were meant to save everyone and we could choose who lived, then we'd had too much power. No one in this universe has that right. Not even me"

Rose shrugged. "But that's not fair"

"No, it's not"

Tears trickled down her face and she wiped them away with the back of her hand. All she felt was shame.

"Rose, he was possessed. If you didn't fire the gun, he would have gone back to Earth. That would have put everyone at risk. You did the right thing"

"It wasn't right" she stood up, anger filling her voice. "He was human like me".

"Rose, he's nothing like you". The Doctor's voice was dry and very serious.

"What does that mean?" She asked him, confused by his tone. The Doctor didn't answer her.

"Doctor, what does that mean?" Rose repeated.

"Look, you should try to get some rest. We can talk about it in the morning." He moved away from her, turning his back.

"Well, we knows what that means" She said, not hiding the sarcasm from her voice.

"Rose, I'm telling you to leave it alone." He sounded angry, but more so at himself than her.

"You think I did the right thing?"

"Yes" he said firmly.

"What if it was someone else? What is if was Ida or Mr Jefferson?"

"Rose that's not-"

"Not what?" She continued, getting frustrated "What if it was me?"

The Doctor spun around to her, his eyes were dark, darker than Rose had seen them in a while. "But it wasn't you, was it"

Rose strode towards and grabbed his arm. "If it was me that was possessed, will it still have been the right thing?"

He kept the eye contact and said with a calm voice. "But that didn't happen, Rose. You're safe".

"So, you're saying you would have done something different if it was me?" Rose said, unsure of where the conservation was heading. "You said it yourself the Beast is dangerous, would you have brought it aboard to find a solution?"

"Rose-"

"Would you?"

"Rose, I'm telling you to drop it!" The Doctor was nearly shouting at her, which scared them both.

"What makes my life more important than anyone else's?"

"Everything!" He shouted.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Sorry, this has taken so long to update. I was over thinking it. **

**Thanks for the reviews so far. xx**

There was an awkward silence, and the two friends could hardly look at each other. The Doctor leant against the kitchen counter and rubbed his eyes. Neither of them knew what to say next. What could be said? The silence was killing her, so she trudged to the door. Fearing the worse, the Doctor moved away, and pushed the door closed before she could leave.

"I promised your mother I would keep you safe". There was a sadness in his eyes that she had never seen before. He took a deep breath, almost like he was bracing himself. "So, yes in that respect, I'm glad it was Toby and not you".

She nodded. The Doctor's hand slipped from the door and she hurried out the room, not looking back.

Rose ran to her room and slammed the door behind her, a little too hard. She didn't mean it but there was so much frustration in her system and she needed to take it out something. The Doctor's statement had completely thrown her. His brutal honesty, not only shocked her, but scared her.

She examined around the room and saw the broken lamp in the corner. Knowing that she needed something to distract her for a second, she bent down to pick up the pieces.

"Do you still believe in him?" said a chilling voice behind her.

Rose spun around to see Toby leaning against the wardrobe. Rose saw the smug expression on his face, it made her feel sick.

"Is this another dream?" She asked.

Toby ignored the question and glanced around the room. Rose followed his gaze, wondering what his eyes were searching for.

"How long do you think this will last?" he said indicating the room.

"What?"

"Do you think you will be with him forever?" Toby's voice was dry and emotionless. "You are living on borrowed time, child. The ghosts of the Doctor's past are catching up with him. You will be caught in the crossfire"

Trying not to panic, Rose pinched her arm, hard, hoping it was a dream. That her fight with the Doctor was a figment of her imagination and that he was in the next room reading a book, safe. She looked back up and Toby hadn't moved. There was a red mark on her skin, but Rose didn't want to take her eyes off Toby in case he moved for the door or towards her.

"This isn't real" she stated "this is my mind playing tricks on me, making me see things"

"Is that what you hope?"

"I know it. You're not here, Toby, and I am truly sorry for that. It wasn't your fault".

Toby scoffed, and stepped towards her old dressing table. He picked up a photo of Rose and the Doctor. It was a picture of them just after he regenerated, both of them with Christmas hats on, grinning with their arms around each other. The Doctor didn't want to take the photo but she had insisted. Rose smiled at the memory.

_The valiant child who will die in battle so very soon._

"You never answered my question, do you still believe in him?" Toby asked, turning to her.

Meanwhile in the kitchen, the Doctor was pacing. He had a tendency to run his hands through his hair when he was stressed or trying to think of a solution, but at the moment looked like he had been dragged through a hedge backwards, his hair pointing in every direction.

_If you talk to Rose… _

He marched towards the door, his hand hovered over the handle, but he hesitated.

_… tell her…_

He hesitated for the second time today.

He didn't like that, he didn't like that at all.

_… oh, she knows. _

_But she didn't, not really_, he thought. The Doctor opened the door and headed for Rose's room.

He peered in to see Rose on her bed, sitting on top of the covers with her legs crossed. Her eyes were red from where she had been crying. The Doctor could have kicked himself. The last thing he would ever want to is hurt her. But then his eyes lowered to her hands, they were shaking, not from being, cold but of sheer fright. What could have her so scared?

Before he could say anything, Rose spoke, staring at her legs. Looking at him right now, was too much to bear. "Please leave".

"Let me explain"

"I don't need you to explain, I need to you to go"

The Doctor closed the door behind him but kept his distance from the bed and leant against her wardrobe.

"Do you want me to send you home?"

"What?" Rose said, finally looking up.

"Always your choice. If you don't want to stay, I won't force you" he said, praying to Gods he doesn't believe in that she doesn't take the offer.

"I don't know" Rose replied.

The Doctor's hearts sank. He had to fix the situation, living like this was unbearable for a few minutes, let alone if it was to last for hours. Rose watched him carefully as he moved nearer to the bed, but she didn't push him away. The Doctor took this as a good sign. He knelt in the space that had previously been covered by broken pieces of lamp.

"Cleaned up then?" He said, smiling.

"Yeah, I had to. Knowing my luck I would have cut my foot open"

"Weeell, health hazard. Although you hopping instead of running would have been fun to see"

Her lips twitched, trying not smile. A glimmer of hope.

"Was that a smile?" He quoted himself, grinning.

"No"

"That was a smile."

"No, it wasn't" she said, trying to regain her composure.

"Yeah, it was" He beamed at her, but Rose shook her head, trying not to lose.

She lifted her head, and then bit her lip so she wouldn't scream. Toby was standing behind the Doctor, with a finger to his lips.


	4. Chapter 4

"Doctor" her voice became serious again and his grin faded.

She reached out to take his hand, but her eyes were locked on Toby and she couldn't look away. He was quick on his feet and had already proven that, and daren't risk injury to either of them. The Doctor's hearts were pounding in chest, he knew Rose was petrified and he made a silent vow to help through whatever was happening.

"Rose, what are you looking at?" The Doctor's eyes searched the room, but from his point of view, there was nothing wrong, nothing out of the ordinary. Nothing struck him to suggest that Rose was in trouble. Well, nothing physical.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you" she said in a quiet voice.

"You're talking to a man who lives a box that's bigger on the inside, fights aliens on a daily basis and can regrow his hand, try me".

With that statement, Rose could feel a new strength inside her. She trusted the Doctor more than anyone and she knew that he could bring her back. If her mind was falling apart or Toby had somehow survived, then he could fix it. Rose clamped her eyes shut and when she opened them, Toby was gone.

"Doctor, you know that picture of me and you at Christmas, where is it?" she said quickly.

Confused, the Doctor saw it on the dressing table, just as it should be. He let go of her hand, walked over to the table and picked it up.

"I can't believe you convinced me to take this picture. I never do photos and yet somehow, Rose Tyler, you got me to do it" He said with a grin.

"It's in one piece, right?"

"Why wouldn't it be?"

_It's buried beneath us. In the darkness, waiting. _

She blinked back tears, trying so hard not to break down. She needed to be strong. "Doctor, Toby was here. I saw him, he was here. He grabbed that photo and threw it at the wall."

"Is he here now?"

She shook her head and titled her head to the ceiling. "What's happening to me?"

The Doctor pulled out his sonic screwdriver, the tip lit up blue and he held it checking for signs of what was wrong. He shook his head after a few seconds, adjusted the settings and pointed it to the ceiling.

"Rose, you trust me, right?"

"Yes" she sniffed.

"Good, trust is very good thing. Helps people, people who need saving -" he groaned in frustration and he threw the screwdriver up in the air, caught it and placed it in his pocket. "well, that theory's out the window"

"What were you looking for?"

The Doctor dropped to the floor, and peered under the bed. Rose wiped away the last of her tears and gaped at him.

She moved herself to the end of her bed, just as the Doctor lifted his head. Catching her off guard, Rose jumped at his sudden movement.

"What the hell are you looking for?"

"Clues, Rose, what else" he said as if it was obvious. "If something's got on the to the Tardis, then I want to know how"

He jumped to his feet and looked around the room again, scratching his head. Rose heaved herself off the bed and waved her hand in front of his face, trying to his attention. He didn't acknowledge her till she jabbed him in the arm.

"Ow" the Doctor whined.

"You know you're starting to piss me off" She was close shouting at the Doctor, because he wasn't telling her what was buzzing around in his head. She hated when he didn't tell her everything.

The Doctor rubbed his arm, and glared at her. "Alright, sorry. It's just it doesn't make any sense. If something was to get aboard the Tardis, then would be an alarm. Alarm with big flashing lights letting me know what's happening but..."

Without warning, the Doctor ran out the room leaving Rose. "Hold on, just thought of something"

"Doctor?!" Rose shouted, her voice shaking more than she would like it to.

_They buried something. Now, it's reaching out. Calling us in. _

"Alone again, Rose"

"You know I'm getting sick of the sound of your voice" she snarled.

She turned slowly to see him sitting on the bed, with his arms balanced on his knees, but his eyes were focused on Rose.

"I shall never die. The thought of me is forever" Toby growled.

"Don't I know it" she said, half smiling to herself.

"The man of fire who leave his precious companion behind"

"He would never do that" Rose said "He's going to find a way to beat you. Send you back to wherever it is you came from."

Toby rose from the bed, his gaze never leaving hers. Rose could feel herself getting tired but she wasn't beaten yet. If the Beast was trying to use her then she would fight with everything she has.

"Why are you here?" She asked, backing to the door.

She turned to the door but Toby was already there, blocking her way to escape his torment. _He's too quick, _she thought. He towered over her, casting down judgement on the poor pink and yellow human.

"If a human was to kill on Earth, they would go to prison with others like themselves?"

"Yeah."

"Do you think yourself better than them? Knowing that no one will throw you in a cell, waiting until the day someone brings you a key"

Rose didn't answer him, the guilt was stuck in her chest like knife, his words cutting her deeper.

"Do you think that because you can travel through the stars, that makes you better than others? That you're superior?"

"No, of course not"

Rose needed to get out the room, away from him. Her anger was bubbling under the surface and she dug her nails in her hand to stop her lashing out.

"Let me out"

Toby took a step back, allowing her access doorway. What this a trick? At that moment Rose didn't care, her only mission was to find the Doctor. She dashed towards the door but not before it slammed shut.

Toby cackled behind her "Did you think it would be that easy. Your mind is mine Rose Tyler"

"Doctor! Doctor, please!" Her hand slammed against the door, again and again, hoping that the Doctor would hear her cry for help.

"Do you think his hearts will break when he realises what you have become?"

Her hand slipped and she leant her forehead against the cold wood. She bit back a sob "Is this my punishment?"

"The human child and the Time Lord, together you are strong but separate you be become dust" Toby roared like animal.

"Time—" Rose said, quietly.

The Beast was winning, he knew it wasn't long until the girl's mind broke, and her fears had beaten her. That was until he heard a small giggle, that grew and Rose broke into laughter. She turned around and faced him, holding her hand to her mouth, trying not laugh again.

A glimmer of hope.

Toby raised an eyebrow, bewildered by her sudden emotion.

"You said Time Lord" Rose's hand relaxed and she pointed at Toby. "The Doctor never said he was a Time Lord."

Toby's face twisted, the hatred in his eyes wavered as Rose's voice became more determined.

"You're not here. This isn't real—" She eyes looked around the room, and walked towards him. Her heart rate slowed and she took a deep breath. Her confidence growing with every step.

"Trust me, Rose" said a distant, familiar voice.

"These are the words of the Beast. I'm the darkness that fills the hearts of men and it brings them to their knees."

"We never said that the Doctor was even alien. How did you know that?"

Toby's eyes returned to their nature human state. He shook his head, and clenched his jaw.

"Get out" Rose shouted. "Get out of my head!"

Toby roared again, but he sounded as if he was in pain. Rose quickly grabbed the door handle but the door was jammed shut. Both her hands clasped around the handle, but there was a loud crack behind her.

Hesitating, Rose spun around to see Toby on his knees, hands dug into the carpet, his body contorted in agony. It looked as if he was struggling to breathe, he arched his back and another loud crack echoed through the room. It sounded like bones breaking. Toby hoisted his head, the fire in his eyes was burning through the skin. Rose could smell the burnt flesh, as the scent filled the room.

"You cannot destroy the Beast" He bellowed.

"I'm sorry, Toby" Rose yelled back. She wasn't scared anymore, all she felt was pity.

Toby released his grip on the carpet, the symbols on his face melted, the black ink dribbled down his face, marking the carpet. He jumped to his feet and launched himself at Rose.


	5. Chapter 5

Rose screamed as Toby's body came towards her. She felt a hand on her shoulder and the demon in front of her eyes vanished. She slid down the door, breathing heavily. Rose glanced around the room to see the Doctor kneeling down beside her. He smiled, and wrapped his arms around her. Rose hugged him back, breathing out a sigh of relief.

"You okay?" he asked, pulling back.

"Yeah" She paused for a second, taking everything in. Rose ran her hand down the side of his face, she could feel his soft skin under her fingertips.

"Hello" his voice was as warm as his skin but that didn't stop Rose from slapping around the face. The Doctor stumbled back, holding his face.

"What was that for?" he yelled half-heartedly.

"You left" Rose yelled back "You left me to deal with this myself, how could you do that?"

The Doctor rubbed his face. "I never left, I've been here the whole time".

Rose stood up and gaped at the carpet. There was no black ink, no sign that Toby was there. She rested her head against the door and groaned.

"Can you please explain?" Rose asked "My head hurts"

"Your head?" Rose glared at him and he titled his head, agreeing with her. "Alright, fair enough"

Rose trudged to the bed, and collapsed, feeling the familiar covers beneath her. She knew she was home. She knew she was safe.

"Rose, what have you been feeling every time Toby shows up?" the Doctor said, sitting next to her.

"Fear" Rose said "Why?"

He turned to her, his expression soften. "And?"

"Guilt. Doctor, I told you I feel guilty for killing a man"

"And I told you the mind plays tricks on us"

Rose wrinkled her nose, confused. The Doctor pulled the photo from his pocket and showed it to her.

"Guilt and fear are a lethal combination together. Does all sorts of things to a person. Did Toby appear every time you got scared or angry?"

Rose nodded, taking the photo from him. "Yeah, he was taunting me"

"Toby was never on the Tardis, he died the minute he was sucked into the black hole" the Doctor held her hand tight. "The images of Toby in your mind are because you feel you should be punished for his death. You're blaming yourself and your guilt was going to destroy and consume you because, that's who you are".

"So, I am going mad?"

"No, course not" the Doctor said placing a kiss on the top of her head. "Your mind needed to work through everything that has happened in the last few hours. You needed to face your demons on your own".

_"Alright, sorry. It's just it doesn't make any sense. If something was to get aboard the Tardis, then would be an alarm. Alarm with big flashing lights letting me know what's happening but" The Doctor turned his back on Rose, placing the photo frame in his pocket_

_"Doctor?!"_

_ "But everything will be fine if we put our heads together. Shouldn't be a problem" _

_"You know I'm getting sick of the sound of your voice" she snarled. _

_ "Oi, that's a bit harsh!" The Doctor twirled around "Rose?" _

_Rose was looking at the end of the bed. The Doctor looked around the room, but again there was nothing. Rose was seeing things. The Doctor kept his distance but watched her movements carefully. _

_ "Don't I know it" she said, half smiling to herself. _

_"Rose, what's happening?" The Doctor could hear the sound of panic in his own voice. "Is Toby here again? Can you hear me?" _

_"He would never do that" Rose said "He's going to find a way to beat you. Send you back to wherever it is you came from."_

_"I hope you can hear me, Rose, but listen I'm right here. I'm not going to leave you, I never would" _

"The mind is complex thing" the Doctor stated. He looked at Rose again. His beautiful human was tired, she yawned and he knew the last thing she needed now was him rambling on.

Rose was going through something and she needed sometime to herself to get through it. And due to his confession earlier, he thought it was best to let her make her decision about staying by herself. She shouldn't have to feel like she owes him something.

"You should get some rest" he said, standing up.

Before he could step away, Rose grabbed him by his jacket and yanked back down on the bed. "Please stay" she whispered. There was still a helplessness in her voice. "I don't want to go, I don't want you to go"

The Doctor propped himself against the backboard, while Rose snuggled against his chest, pulling his arms around her. She could feel his heartbeats again. It was comforting sound that made the last few hours seem surreal.

"Doctor, what did you mean earlier?" Rose asked.

"Doesn't matter".

She lifted her head to face him properly. The question lingered into the air, but Rose's intense gaze made him break under pressure. How could he deny her anything?

"Rose, I care about everyone that travels with me and I protect them, whatever the cost. I won't apologise for that. They travel with me and they put their lives in my hands. I can show them the wonders of the universe but it comes at price. And not everyone comes back. But you… He trailed off for second, trying to think of the words. "I've been running for so long now. Nine hundred years of time and space and it hardens you. But the day I met you that all changed."

Rose looked dumbstruck, thinking she must have misheard him. It wasn't those three little words, but it was closer than anything else he had ever said. The Doctor didn't like to be vulnerable and admitting that out loud, terrified him. He gently moved his arm away from her again, fearing rejection but not before she tugged it back, so his hand rested on her waist. Rose's heart fluttered at his touch.

"Thanks for being here" she mumbled, her sleepiness getting the better of her.

The Doctor never needed any sleep, but at the moment the thought of him and Rose on her bed, falling asleep in each other's arms was too good of an opportunity to pass up. He stroked her hair and could hear her drifting off to sleep. Before long he could feel himself go to the land of nod. And within a few minutes both travellers were fast asleep, dreaming of their next journey. Happy and safe.

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who has followed and reviewed this story, it's really appreciated. Hope you like the ending. xx**


End file.
